Sunday, July 12, 2009

Dream Job

Have you ever thought about your "Dream Job?" The job you would really like to do. When I first heard this assignment in one of my graduate courses in the counseling program at CSUS, I didn't really see the point. I wasn't sure if it was possible to have my dream job, so why would I want to write about it. I did the assignment anyway and wrote about having my own office, having time for self-expression, and helping to inspire others.

Since then in workshops and classes, I've given the assignment to "Write a job description for your dream job." The job description makes the dream job more real and concrete. In my own job description I was:
  • my own boss
  • gave presentations
  • facilitated workshops
  • provided coaching and counseling
  • had flexible hours
  • traveled occasionally
Now I am doing all of those things. Writing down my job description helped make my dream job happen. I made my priority health and happiness over high profits, and I am happy with that decision as I continue to grow my business.

Career expert and author Kathy Hansen, PhD writes about the "Storytelling Resume" and the idea of writing a "Job Wanted" description. I think the "Job Wanted" description would be the next step after writing your dream job and job description. These three steps would help prepare you for writing a "Storytelling Resume.":
  1. Describing your "Dream Job"
  2. Writing your own "Job Description"
  3. Developing a "Job Wanted" ad
Cultures around the world use storytelling and understand that painting a vivid picture leaves an imprint on a person's mind that will stay with them. When you apply or interview for a job, you want to make an impression that the interviewer will remember. Storytelling paints that picture. For more on storytelling, follow Kathy Hansen's blog (see side panel) or follow her on Twitter for career insights. Knowing how to tell a powerful story in a short period of time in writing or verbally is the key to making a lasting impression.






This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations.

Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Wednesday, July 08, 2009

You Are Your Business

If you were a business, what would you name yourself? Actually, you are in the business of YOU. You were given a name at birth that you have been identified with, but you could take a few minutes to think about what you would name yourself. I found that naming my own business gave me an identity that I had developed myself. Regardless of whether or not you own a business or ever want to, you do manage yourself, your family, and/or a career. Having a personal brand or identity that you have thought about and personally named can help you in your career or business. Thinking about your personal brand or identity can also help you determine your purpose in life. Writing a name, telling your story, or making a graphic picture like a coat of arms to identify your family will help you envision your purpose. You are the boss in your business. If you were to write a job description for yourself, what would it look like? How would you spend your time, and how much would you pay yourself? No matter what your current career path is, knowing what you want will direct you to the success you are looking for.

Have you ever thought about the fact that if you consider yourself an employee in your home, work, or family, you are not taking charge of your wants and needs. As your own boss, you don't always get everything you want, but you will develop skills in compassion, resourcefulness, teamwork, and leadership. You will plan how you want to spend your time and money. In fact, you are in the business of you. It's up to you to make your business a success. You're the boss, enjoy the process.

This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations.

Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Freedom Walking

Walking frees the body and mind. Moving the muscles frees them to do what they were meant to do. Our muscles are stressed by lack of use. In fact, if they are not used often they are stressed to the point of injury at times when they are suddenly used for high impact activity. Our mental muscles are no different from any other muscles. They are stressed by sudden changes and overuse such as watching television and then driving in traffic. But strengthening your physical and mental muscles creates a resilient body and mind. A resilient mind is:
  • creative
  • fluid
  • intuitive
When your brain gets regular healthy exercise it is more prepared for the sudden changes in life. Healthy non competitive exercise increases blood flow and circulation to your brain that improves your ability to think creatively.

Choosing to walk whenever possible frees the air of pollution while freeing your muscles to grow and develop. Endorphins are generated by increased brain activity that frees the brain to create and adapt. How can you find time to walk you might ask. You can choose to make opportunities when things are not going the way you would like them to. For example, yesterday I missed the bus coming home from the dentist's office. I knew the next one wouldn't be coming for another hour. I assumed it was only about 3 or 4 miles home, and I could walk that in the time it would take to wait. I had already taken my two and a half mile morning walk, so I was in the habit of walking. A few months earlier I would have thought of the walk as a daunting task, and I would have stopped for coffee rather than walk. But knowing the freedom of walking rather than driving or taking the bus, I was off. An hour's walk is actually very pleasant if the weather isn't extreme. I was glad I chose freedom walking.

You can easily find opportunities to walk or ride a bicycle when your car doesn't start, you forget your lunch, you need to run an errand, or you find an event to walk or run for a cause. Children and dogs are great motivators. With increased obesity and diabetes in children and even pets, you can prevent so many health problems by getting out for a walk. Dinner time? Have a salad, smoothie, or veggie burrito instead of a big meal. You will free up plenty of time for walking. My daughter and I walk our dogs and motivate each other to get up early in the morning and take longer walks than we ever would alone. I would never get up that early consistently to walk by myself. You can easily motivate someone else to walk or ride a bike. Find a partner and enjoy freedom walking!


This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations.

Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Sunday, July 05, 2009

"Three Cups of Tea"

I just finished reading the book, "Three Cups of Tea" by Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin. I bought the book thinking I would dive into a story about a heroic man who went to the middle east to establish schools for girls. I was surprised to find that the book was about a mountain climber who attempted to climb K2. It is amazing to me that people will risk their lives and that of others to climb mountains. While it takes admirable stamina and bravery to attempt such feats, I was looking for a story about schools.

I stuck with the story and learned about more than schools or programs. I learned about rugged terrain, unfamiliar cultures, and brave people. I was amazed at the whole process of starting a massive project with no money, experience, or support. Dogged determination, gratitude, and passion for a people drove Greg Mortenson to persevere until a school was built.

I read several reviews of this book on Amazon. Reviewers were quick to call Mortenson a great hero or to call him an overzealous ramroder. While most people felt the book was exceptional, a few thought it was poorly written and glossed over Mortenson's short comings. But one of the things I really like about the book was the fact that the author showed Mortenson as a hero as well as compassionate, independent, and obsessed with his mission. Every hero has a human side, and anyone who accomplishes the magnitude of work that Mortenson did, will have his faults. I thought the book showed both sides of Mortenson very clearly. Through his journey, we also saw how a man who began by single-handedly attempting to build programs in a country he knew little about, learned to work with the people and cultures he lived with. I would highly recommend this book, not for it's literary style, but for the shear breadth of experiences, accomplishments and adventures through worlds we often know little about.

"Here (in Pakistan and Afghanistan), we drink three cups of tea to do business; the first you are a stranger, the second you become a friend, and the third, you join our family, and for our family we are prepared to do anything--even die."
- Haji Ali, Korphe Village Chief, Karakoram Mountains, Pakistan ("Three Cups of Tea")


This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations.

Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Saturday, July 04, 2009

Run 4 Independence

What a great way to celebrate the 4th of July! Fast walking in the Run 4 Independence to support the Elk Grove Food Bank Services. I enjoyed walking with my daughter among the many families who participated. Despite the tough economy, there was a record turnout. Layoffs, furloughs, and cut backs are affecting all of us in some way. Friends, family, favorite stores, and neighborhood restaurants are closing. But even in tough times, most of us have support systems. We may have job skills, the ability to relocate, work experience, unemployment, or family who can help.

There are some families however, who are stuck in a cycle of poverty lacking family support and work experience. Young people and adults with disabilities need opportunities to function as members of a society in a great country. Parents who work at minimum wage jobs and those who come from temporary jobs with no benefits need help to survive and feed their families until they can get back on their feet. The community of Elk Grove as well as runners from other areas made the effort to support basic services for those who need them.

As a career counselor and coach, I always encourage people to use the services they need and then give back to the community when they are able to. Children don't need to be hungry in America. Families need a chance to eat, work, and live. It was wonderful to participate in this 4th of July celebration!


This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations.

Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Solar Heater

In my list of things I'm mad or unhappy about today I wrote, "the heat." I really don't like triple digit heat. I would like to think that I don't get unhappy and especially not mad, but truthfully I do. Admitting it to myself is the hard part. It's easy to say I'm not really mad, just annoyed. Or I'm not unhappy about anything, I'm just waiting for a better day (like things to cool off.) When I'm honest with myself, I admit that I sometimes get mad, annoyed, or feel unhappy about things. Especially in the heat. So in working on my list of ways to "Resolve or get over it," I realized I needed to dry my clothes. I really don't like to wear them out in the clothes dryer, and I don't like them hanging around the house.

In the middle of my meltdown I realized that I had a great outdoor heater and a cool place to work inside. What could be better? I hung my clothes on my "solar heater" for a quick dry. Now for a blog note and then off to clean up. This afternoon will be a great time for journaling, writing, reading, or meditating on what a great day it is.

This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations.
Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Frugal Phone Lunch

Save time and money with a frugal phone lunch. I was looking forward to having lunch with a friend today, but fortunately for her she had just had a second interview and needed to write a proposal. We decided to catch up and share information over the phone. We saved time and money by having a phone lunch. We had a great conversation, and we didn't need to talk with mouths full of food. We just had the fun part.

So many of us are busy and don't want to take time to go out to lunch or go to an office to work. Working by phone can be the perfect solution. Phone coaching is more than a lunch conversation. LifeWork Coaching is a conversation with a purpose, and the focus is you.

This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations.

Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Are you ready to love?

Love has so many very different meanings in the English language that it is hard to imagine they all come from the same word. Love can mean anything from a score in tennis to deep love and passion for something or someone. For example it’s not hard to fall in love with a puppy, but to make a long-term commitment to care for that cute little puppy as it grows and matures takes a different kind of love. Human relationships are even more complex. Most of us need training in communication and relationship building skills to learn to love and care for other people. In a world that is rapidly changing and often seems to be running wild, one of the few things we have control over is the way we relate to and care for other people.

Relationship building skills are now one of the most important skills for building a successful career, healthier living, and true happiness. The first step in developing a healthy relationship with another person is to develop trust. The best way to develop trust is by showing understanding or putting your self in another person’s shoes. What does it really mean to walk in another person’s shoes? I have to ask my self “Do I really want to know what it feels like to be in that person’s shoes?” In fact, there are many days when I feel like my own shoes are heavy enough, so why would I want to add more weight?

Feeling heavy with my own life and busyness, I might feel like I don’t want to know how someone else feels. Do I need to care that much for everyone, or just the people who are my friends, family and neighbors? God tells us to love him with all our heart, soul, and strength (Deut. 6:5.) It takes a lifetime for many of us to care so deeply for another person who shares our interests and values, but what about people who may be unhappy, in pain, or who have caused us pain? If we really want to learn to love in a way that changes lives and makes the world safer, we are challenged to love with all of our strength, and to love our neighbors as ourselves (Matthew 5:43.) in the Sermon on the Mountain, Jesus goes even further and challenges us to “love our enemies.”

We listen to an internal voice all day telling us what needs to be done, where we need to go, and whom we need to see. Sometimes our voices are so loud that we shut out the people we care about. If we follow Jesus’ example and love others as ourselves, then we will listen to others at least as much as we listen to ourselves. I’ve noticed many times in my own relationships that it is hard to just STOP what I’m doing, LOOK at the person, and LISTEN to what they are saying. In the Relationship Enhancement series, “Ready for Love,” authors Mary Ortwein, M.S. and Bernard G. Guerney, Jr. Ph.D. say that you need to go even further than just stop, look, and listen if you want to develop trusting communication. Excerpt from “10 Ways to Show Understanding.” (9)

1. “STOP what you’re doing to pay close attention when someone talks to you.”
2. “When you listen, LOOK at the other person in a caring way.
3. “When you LISTEN, imagine you are the other person.”

Some people seem to naturally listen intuitively in a way that shows they care, while others need to make a conscious effort to listen to others as much as themselves. I find it very hard to take the time to really stop and be in the moment with someone I care about. The eighth step in showing understanding may be the hardest for me.

8. “When someone is tired, rest together.”

How wonderful it would be to care enough to stop and rest with another person. Time is one of the greatest gifts you can give another person. Taking the time to develop healthy relationships actually takes the weight off rather than adding weight to your life. Loneliness, resentment and anger add weight to a person’s shoes. Sharing, caring, and giving support for others can be much like arch supports that give you a lift. Are you ready to love with all your heart, soul, and strength? I’m challenging myself to begin by listening.


This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations.

Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Job Hunting Full Time?

Should your job search be a full-time job?

I was just reading an article about how to work on your job search full time. The article on The Dollar Stretcher, recommends taking a couple of weeks off and then diligently working 40 hours a week on your job search. There are some excellent suggestions in the article for organizing a full time job search such as using a calendar, planning your day, getting out and networking, and hitting the pavement full speed. This is good advice for those job seekers who feel like they are looking for a job full time while they are sitting behind a computer and sending out resumes. They can easily become disappointed by their efforts. I would like to suggest that you step back and first look at what you really want and need.

When you end a job whether planned or not, it's important to take time to appraise your values and strengths, find your motivation, and know what you really want.
  • Do you need a job NOW?
  • Do you have time to find out what you really want to do?
If you NEED a job NOW to avoid financial crisis, I would recommend starting your job search as soon as you have looked into resources available to you and done a self-evaluation. Then hit the pavement running using all of the strategies possible while getting out and meeting people. If you have not gotten a job using this strategy, follow the guide below.

If you are not near crisis, but need to get a job I would suggest a combination of:
  • Using resources available
  • Self-evaluation
  • Learning job search strategies
  • Spending quality time with family
  • Spiritual growth
  • Physical fitness
  • Networking
  • Volunteering
  • Working with a professional association
  • Working in the community
  • Planting a garden
As part of my coaching practice, I do pro bono work c0-teaching a class at the community garden, networking with a colleague, helping women who have challenges to employment, growing herbs, and talking to community gardeners. I often meet gardeners who spend time helping the community, growing vegetables, networking and working on their job search at the same time. They are able to save money by growing vegetables for themselves while taking time to de-stress and stay fit. The energy and health they get from gardening and talking to fellow gardeners will help them look and feel better for an interview. The worst thing a job seeker can do is sit in front of the computer all day sending out resumes and letters. That is only a small part of the job search process. The key to being the job seeker who gets the job is:
  1. Know your strengths
  2. Say what you want
  3. Have a great resume
  4. Prepare an interesting cover letter
  5. Follow up each contact with a thank you
  6. Stay active and involved
  7. Meet new people
  8. Don't wait for someone to come to you
Find someone who can provide you with support and accountability. If your intensive job search is not paying off, don't get discouraged, call a LifeWork coach to help you bring your life and work into balance. Call Nancy Miller, M.S. for more information at (916) 686-2137 or email success@lifeworkplan.com.

This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations.
Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Fabulous Smoothie

Fabulous Smoothie

(makes 2-4 servings)

 1 Orange

1 Banana

5-7 Baby Carrots cut in half

Soy Milk (about a cup)

Blend high speed

Add frozen Blueberries

Add fresh of frozen softened Strawberries

Add about a cup of crushed ice

Blend high speed

Add about a cup of plain yogurt

A couple of handfuls of spinach

A squirt of honey

Blend on low to medium

The spinach/orange juice combination makes the orange juice less acidic and the vitamin C in the orange juice helps you absorb in iron in the spinach. “The Color Code” (79). 


This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations. Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Thursday, June 11, 2009

We All Have Dreams

We all have dreams and visions of what our lives will be. Our dreams and aspirations keep us motivated, energized and ready for the next opportunity. You may be starting a business, a career, a family, or facing a crisis. Your passion may be drawing you in a new and exciting direction, or you may be wondering, "what next?" A sudden change may set you in a whirlwind, or you may feel like your life is constantly stuck in traffic.

There are always new opportunities. It's just a matter of being ready and recognizing them when when they present themselves. We all need encouragement, accountability, and clarity to stay motivated to succeed. You may need to re-evaluate your definition of success, set new goals, or find a lifestyle that keeps you energized. One way to be open to new possibilities is to fill your life with more of what you want.

What do you need more of in your life and work? When you fill yourself with more of what you want, there is less room for what you don't want. Be healthier, more successful and have more fun in your work and play. You can find more of what you want in many ways:


This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations. Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Sunday, June 07, 2009

Living Greener

As I was cleaning out a wastebasket this morning, I reached for a biodegradable, flushable, Disposable Cleaning Cloth. For the dirtiest jobs, I still rely on disposable cloths or paper towels, but I am much more conscious of the environmental impact of tossing paper towels and disposable cleaning cloths into the trash. I rarely use paper plates and minimize the use of napkins as I find ways to be more financially and environmentally responsible. As I work toward having a greener business, a more responsible lifestyle, and a tighter budget, I am reminded of a time when my grandmother washed the plastic wrap and aluminum foil and hung it to dry. At the time it seemed silly, but looking back I can see that she was one of the first in the family to have a greener lifestyle.

In our family, being greener first became part of our lives out of necessity. We took the bus because my father worked out of town and my mother didn’t drive. Many of us in our family inherited a vision challenge that prevented driving during all or part of our lives. As a teenager, I was thrilled to pass the driving test after a couple of attempts and a note from my ophthalmologist. As a teenager I relished driving and used the car as much as I could afford to. With gasoline costing twenty-five cents a gallon, and no cable TV or computers, cruising was a popular teenage past time. Then came the 70’s with marriage, job transitions, and the rising price of gasoline. We cut back on driving, paper products, made bread, jams, and pizza as well as clothes for the kids. We were living greener out of financial necessity.

Then as our income increased so did our consumption. With teenagers, camping, and entertaining we used massive amounts of styrofoam containers, paper plates, and gasoline. It seemed like a natural progression in American life to enjoy the all of the conveniences we could afford. Takeout, packaging, and driving were a way of life.

About the middle of this decade, I began noticing that our trashcan wasn’t big enough, our closets were overflowing, and our waists were expanding. Too much consumption! As we usher in a new world of work that is transitional, individual, and skill based rather than following a ladder of upward mobility, we are finding that being more frugal is again another way of being greener.

I am looking for ways to have a greener lifestyle and a greener business. If you have ideas or websites of interest, please share.



This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations. Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Enjoying Blue Skies and Blueberries


What a beautiful morning! We beat the heat with a morning walk with our two dogs. Then my husband and I enjoyed coffee and breakfast on the patio. If I'm not enjoying one of Bruce's famous fruit & vegetable smoothies, I enjoy blueberries on my cereal for breakfast. I was left with only the bag of frozen blueberries, since I finished off the fresh ones one my cereal, but frozen blueberries are great on a hot day.

Blueberries are one of the Superfoods that promote a healthy lifestyle. Eating fresh fruit and vegetables is so much better than taking pills. While genetics always play a part, you can avoid getting some of the common illnesses and diseases at an early age by eating superfoods. Besides being packed with antioxidants and vitamin C, blueberries are anti-inflammatory and lower your risk of cancer and heart disease. I enjoy blueberries fresh, but eat them frozen when they are not in season on cereal, yogurt, whole grain pancakes, ice cream, and in smoothies. If you have any other great ways to eat blueberries, please share. You just can't get enough of the blue!


This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations. Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Wednesday, May 06, 2009

Unspoken Language

Ellie is a new guest at our house. She will be staying for a couple of weeks. Although we've known her since she was a baby, she's never stayed with us before. This is the third morning that she has been adjusting to Pepper and Maggie. Pepper and Maggie have their rules. I'm not even sure what they are. But I can see by the way they respond to an unspoken language I don't understand that they are communicating with each other. Obviously Ellie doesn't understand it either. Yesterday morning Ellie was ready to play. She jumped, ran around, wagged her tail and chased Maggie. Maggie bared her teeth (a language every dog understands) and then Pepper came to her rescue (which was completely unnecessary.) Pepper and Maggie know who's boss. That would be Maggie.

But Ellie being a newbie didn't know her place in the group. Today she held back and watched. A couple of times she tried to join the play with Maggie and Pepper, but got the brush off. She had a confused look on her face as she walked away. Being the third dog, she created a triangle that changed the dynamic. Any two of the dogs could have played together, but the third created chaos in the relationship.

Today Ellie is being more cautious and letting Maggie and Pepper get used to her. They are all getting along. Ellie is watching the unspoken language and learning where she fits and when she can join in. Each dog comes from a different background, and each one represents a mixture of breeds. They are all rescue dogs so we don't know for sure what the mix is, but obvious characteristics exist. Ellie has a purple tongue so she is definitely part Chow. Pepper has the poodle fur, floppy ears, and cocks his head like a Cocker Spaniel. Maggie is said to be part Terrier and seems to have some of the Terrier personality. Maggie and Pepper are small dogs who have learned to play and cooperate with each other. Pepper and Maggie have had several homes, and were unwanted and neglected many times. Ellie was rescued as a puppy and has had a loving home all of her life. Pepper's breed, background, and size influence his temperament. He is overprotective and loyal, but he lacks good social skills. He gets nervous and still worries about being abandoned. He does not easily welcome newcomers.

Have you ever felt like you walked into a group of two or more with your friendly face ready to join the group and wondered why you didn't feel like you fit? Nothing was said. You missed the body language. You just knew something happened. Whether you are at work or in a social setting, people have an unspoken language that can be easily missed. You may be walking into a group who has a very different appearance or background from yourself. There may be members who have been wounded by life and others who want to protect them. Take a lesson from Ellie and bring your positive energy to the group. If you are not welcomed, don't be offended. Step back and wait until they feel more comfortable with you and you can find your place in the group. Building relationships and working in groups is a learned process that takes time. But learning to communicate and build supportive relationships is the most important thing we can learn. The world is changing. It can feel very uncertain. But just as Pepper and Maggie learned after having turmoil in their lives, friendships are the most important assets.

This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations. Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Thursday, April 09, 2009

Adjust our expectations?

On the second page of the pamphlet inserted in our retirement portfolio, it says that with our declining investments we need to “adjust our expectations” and re-examine our time horizon. Has your retirement resource brochure been that creative in saying that since you are losing money by investing with them, you should keep your money in the account and not expect a return on your investment? Just work longer. It can all sound very disheartening.

But in this new age of enlightenment many of us are finding that we can live better, spend less, and do work that is meaningful. We chased the money to corporations, retirement accounts and home equity. If that’s all there is, then there is reason to feel angry and anxious. But our attitude and the energy we put into our feelings can work for us or against us. As Nicholas Boothman says in his book, “How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less,” you can choose a ‘Really Useless Attitude’ or a ‘Very Useful Attitude.’ Do you want to be angry and anxious in reaction to your current situation, or do you want to approach your challenges feeling resourceful and relaxed?

For some reason, I believe partly genetic, I tend to naturally get tense and anxious when faced with challenges. I continue to take on difficult tasks, learn through experience, and build up my resilience, but my natural reaction is tension. When I read Boothman’s description of a ‘Very Useless Attitude,’ I realized that I was experiencing some useless attitudes and really didn’t need to. Whether the economy is up or down, you are young or old, jobs are scarce or plentiful you can choose to have a ‘Very Useful Attitude. In my experience excellent jobs have always been scarce. It takes planning, strategies, a positive attitude, and determination to do what it takes to get the job you want. You also need to re-evaluate your goals regularly to see if they are REALLY what you want.

Most of us are going through withdrawals, especially if we are trying to spend less money on junk food, eating out, and frufru coffee. We may be experiencing more than a loss of expectation. We may also be experiencing withdrawal from sugar and fat. Not a bad thing! Leaner is usually healthier and more productive. The same is true for your job search and career development. You may be forced to do what you needed to do all along: Focus on your values, vision, and goals. If you know your strengths and values, have a vision for your life and work, and hire a professional to keep you on track, you have nothing to fear. More than ever, you are your business. Take charge!



This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for assistance with consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs.
Copyright LWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Time of reckoning

Tax time is a time of reckoning..
We finished our personal and business tax filing yesterday. Whew! As I was gathering information for expenditures, income, assets, and liabilities, I realized that it felt like I was reconciling the last year of my life. Many things didn't work out as I had expected. There have been joys and disappointments, but for us it all worked out well at the end of the year. We've had years where April 15th wasn't a day to look forward to. But this year we have been very blessed. We bought a house, my business is going in a new direction, and my husband has set a tentative date for retirement.

So, why was this a year of blessing? Because we actually got a refund? Every year we are blessed in different ways, but I must admit that I am affected by the measures of success around me. I admit it! To measure myself by what I own would be to measure myself on the basis of greed. I remind myself everyday--well actually I often need to be reminded--that success doesn't come from money. I will continue to look for ways to make a difference in the world and those around me this year. Quite a noble goal!

This website is intended for informational purposes only. For professional personal/ career coaching, call or email Nancy for personal/career coaching, consulting, resources, and information to meet your personal needs. See links on the side panel for professional organizations. Copyright CLWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Monday, March 09, 2009

What did you hear today?

Today I enjoyed a beautiful sunny morning in the community garden. A small group of us gathered around a block of dirt surrounded by walkways and imagined how the garden might look and what we wanted to grow. We took a few minutes to breath the air and notice the sounds around us. The sound of birds stood out in my mind. Someone else heard traffic. I seem to be very tuned in to the sound of birds.

My husband and I take long walks through the greenbelt that runs through part of Elk Grove. As we walk past the trees and small lake, my husband points out birds in the water, in the trees, and along the brush. He knows the birds by the sound of their voices. I have become very aware of the sound of birds. I don't know their names, but I listen to their different calls. I no longer remember the sounds of traffic. Because I pay attention to birds, that is what I remember at the end of the day.

Much of our lives are driven by what we choose to hear and pay attention to. What sounds do you remember at the end of the day? Did your day end with the sights and sounds you wanted to think about and dream about? You can choose what to focus on and remember, and your memories become a part of you.

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Copyright CLWD © 2005 Nancy Miller

Monday, March 02, 2009

Looking for Band Aids

During difficult times people are often looking for a Band Aid rather than a vitamin. As a personal/career coach I am in the vitamin business, but right now people seem to be looking for Band Aids rather than vitamins to improve their business or employability. As a culture and a people we have over spent and over indulged. Almost everyone who could did to some degree or another. Now we want quick easy fixes for a big problem.

There may not be quick solutions, but there are things we can do. For one thing, take your vitamins. You can plan, prioritize your values, strengthen your relationships, and tighten your belt. This is a great time to find where the needs are, build up your business skills, and be grateful for what you have. I am very grateful for the material comforts that I am blessed with. As a family, we are doing better financially and relationally than we ever have. When friends were buying bigger houses, we began thinking about downsizing. We sold our house, paid all of our debts, and bought a car and investment house with cash. Friends thought we were crazy for selling our house and buying a house out of state. We thought we were crazy for renting an apartment close to work, walking, taking the bus, and paying cash.

I loved living close to town, walking, and feeling like I was in the heart of all that Sacramento has to offer—the good, bad and the ugly. I felt the discomfort and inconvenience of renting an apartment that flooded, leaked, and smelled musty. I gained empathy for people who were less fortunate than I was. After four years of renting, we had the opportunity to buy a house on a short sale. We weren’t just smart or just lucky, but we were able to tighten our belts for a time, and then find ourselves in a position to benefit from the change in the economy. In my experience, when I lost hope in the future, I spent more on immediate pleasures. For some too much optimism without a reality check led to over indulgence.

I love spending time with family, friends, and colleagues. I look for ways to use my counseling, coaching, and entrepreneurial skills to work in the community. I enjoy sharing what I have learned from my own insights, experiences others have shared with me, and trends in careers and entrepreneurship. Send questions, comments, and experiences as we share this journey together.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Valentine's Day

I have sometimes thought that all of these little holidays can seem trite or pretentious if not just another excuse to sell Hallmark cards. But this year a good friend left a Valentines Day card and bag of goodies on my doorstep. It made me feel good to receive such a thoughtful token of kindness from a friend. After enjoying the chocolates, I thought about friends and family who had been on my mind. It seemed like a convenient time to send the cheery red & pink cards to friends I was thankful for who might be in need of a thoughtful act of kindness. When I received emails and cards saying what the card had meant, it made me feel good.

After the little heart holiday had passed, I realized that I had not gotten something for the friend that motivated me to send cards in the first place. I know that my friend would agree that simple acts of kindness are better passed on than returned. Holidays can be a great time to show an "attitude of gratitude" as researcher Martin Seligman describes one of the characteristics of happiness.

It's so easy to say thank you to people who have made a difference in your life by sending an eCard, a card, an email, posting a message to your blog, or just saying thank you.